Saturday, January 31, 2015

The Other Coat

Out. Flick. Slit. Back.

Once in a while, that is to say, over the course of years, you find yourself, the other part. But long before you find it, you will be it. You will have been it for a while. I wish I could say it was imperceptible, but it isn't. You noticed it, but, like the guy on the corner with the cardboard sign, you told yourself you didn't noticed, and kept driving. Something clicked like bone against bone. Maybe you winced. Maybe you said it was something else.

Out. Flick. Slit. Back.

You are comfortable in your clothes. I mean, you were. You remember when you were. They hung like your chosen thoughts and opinions, and they depicted what you were. And it all fit in the scheme of things, your life, your friends and aspirations.
Then, like a knife from the dark, things change. Pretend it isn't happening. Just a side road. Just a detour on the way to the dream. Side tracked economy. What you laughed you would never do. But life laughs and sometimes not with you.

Out. Flick. Slit. Back.

It's up to you now, and there is no Deus and no ex Machina. There is just you, on your knees before the bottom line, taking stock of where you were, where you want to be, and the time between that takes its sweet, bloody time without you. But when you move forward, this time, it will be all you, the strength in your legs propelling you. And when you are where you want to be, you will have no one to blame but yourself. So grab your coat, the other one. Get to work on the present. Sneak peeks, when no one is looking, at the future.